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Study Finds 98% of NSW Boating Divorces Trace Back to Husband Saying ‘Just Pull the Rope, Love’

LAKE MACQUARIE — A groundbreaking sociological study has confirmed that the most dangerous phrase in the English language isn’t spoken in a war zone, but on a 12-foot tinnie during a botched docking attempt at Belmont.

The phrase, “Just pull the rope, love,” typically uttered by a husband who has completely misjudged the current and his wife’s upper-body strength, is now cited in nearly all maritime-related legal separations. “He expects me to stop three tonnes of fiberglass with a piece of nylon twine while he’s still gunning the engine in reverse,” said one survivor. “Then he has the audacity to ask why I let the boat hit the pylon.”

The study suggests that maritime harmony can only be restored if husbands are legally required to wear a muzzle during the final 50 meters of any approach to a jetty.

More to come.

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