SYDNEY — In a bold response to rising fuel costs, a local boater has introduced a “Flintstones-style propulsion system,” confirming he will now power his vessel by sticking his legs through the hull and running along the river bed.

“It’s simple,” he explained. “No fuel, no worries. Just me, the river floor, and a strong pair of calves.”

The maiden voyage reportedly lasted 14 seconds.

Witnesses say the skipper launched successfully, gave a confident thumbs up, then immediately collapsed after discovering the river floor was “not as flat or shallow as the cartoons suggested.”

“I hit something… coral? A shopping trolley? I don’t know,” he said from the boat ramp, now applying ice packs to both legs. “Either way, the outboard suddenly feels like a bargain.”

Despite the setback, the idea has gained traction among cost-conscious boaters as fuel prices soar past $3.20L, with several early adopters already testing variations of the system, including:

• “Two-person paddling legs” for increased horse(man)power
• Rotating crews to prevent total muscular failure
• And one man who claims he’s “nearly up on the plane” in knee-deep water

Marine experts remain divided, noting the method is “technically fuel-efficient” but may require “a slightly unrealistic level of fitness and a complete disregard for basic physics.”

Still, supporters insist it’s only a matter of time before the concept takes off.

“At $3 a litre, I’m willing to try anything,” one boater said. “Next step is getting the kids involved—smaller legs, higher RPM.”

More to come.